If there was ever a genre that encapsulated a baseball team as well as the 2015 New York Mets, it would 1,000% be a romantic comedy/drama. You start out and it’s all fun, winning in April we’re all excited, then tragedy in May-July almost makes you turn off the movie/game to cry. BUT WAIT! Then we find our perfect guy, and not that loser we used to date (Eric Campbell, John Mayberry, Danny Muno, take your pick) and everything is great again! We fall in love, we see our exes (the Nationals) implode on themselves. Then, we finally do it, we get finally engaged, we finally make the playoffs! The wedding in Los Angeles, while stressful, is amazing, on the honeymoon in Chicago Daniel Murphy hits a million home runs (if you catch my drift), and we grow old together. But all movies have to end, and not all of them are happy. In the end, our heroes die side by side, in the World Series, just like the Notebook.
Even though we couldn’t watch an actual version of this movie, I was able to whip up a pretty nice cast list of romantic comedy vets who could play the Mets.
Matt Harvey= Ben Affleck “Gigli”
This one explains itself right? The Dark Knight? The new Dark Knight, Gigli? They go together like pb&j. Plus, at all times it seems like people either love them, or hate them. No middle ground.
Noah Syndergaard= Eric Stoltz (as Rocky Dennis) “The Mask”
Tell me you don’t see at least a little bit of a resemblance……
Jacob deGrom= Harry Connick Jr. in “PS I love you”
Just a couple of good looking, unassuming, happy-go-lucky guys. One of them won Rookie of the year, pitched his team to the World Series, the other has been the subject of every middle-aged woman’s fantasies since “Will and Grace”.
Steven Matz = Adrien Grenier “The Devil Wears Prada”
Both guys kinda hung around in the background of these movies. Like, they’re good players/actors..….But Vincent Chase and Steven Matz just aren’t Anne Hathaway and Meryl Streep, or Jacob deGrom and Matt Harvey
Bartolo Colon= Matthew McConaughey (no specific romantic comedy)
Ok, before you rush to judgement and laugh this one off, hear me out. Both of these guys are just veterans of the game. Bartolo’s pitched in three different decades, and McConaughey is a nice bet for who has made the most Rom-Coms in history. Neither has the same stuff they used to have. Bartolo isn’t throwing in the high-90s. McConaughey, while still stunning, is no Channing Tatum. That’s just father time. But both found ways to stay not just in the game, but stay at the top of it. Bartolo won 20 games three seasons ago. 15 two seasons ago. Pitched 200 innings this year. McConaughey just won a friggin Oscar and made a gagillion dollars with the two Magic Mike movies. Think about it. Maybe they aren’t so different after all……..
David Wright = Ryan Gosling “The Notebook”
This one gif explains why David Wright is Ryan Gosling in “The Notebook” to us. All he wants to do is win baseball games and make Mets fans happy. He’ll do anything. He’ll be fun if we want. He could be pensive, smart, superstitious…..you get the picture. It’s why we love him. He’ll stand the test of time as one of, if not the best Mets ever. And Ryan Gosling’s character in The Notebook will stand the test of time as being the best male lead in any romance ever because The Notebook is the Citizen Kane of sappy love movies. And I loved it. Every minute of it.
Daniel Murphy= Adam Sandler, 50 first dates
We’re Drew Barrymore in this scenario. We know we should like Daniel Murphy. And we do, in our own way. But we don’t know why. Every day it’s a new freakin guy. He just keeps showing up at the ballpark for dates and sometimes the day is great and we love him, but then we wake up the next day and he makes 4 errors and everything sucks. Only difference is that instead of 50 dates with Adam Sandler, we’ve had 903.
Juan Uribe and Kelly Johnson= Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson “Wedding Crashers”
If nothing else, these guys brought the party to NYC when they were the first ones traded here in late July……Well, maybe just Uribe, but they came as a pair, so who’s the best pair I could think of than these two hooligans.
But then who is Chaz? ……Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Cespedes has hopped from country to country, from team to team, the same way Chaz Reinhold hopped from bed to bed in “Wedding Crashers”. Now, Cespedes picked up this new gig crashing NL East races. And we all know what’s for dinner
Terry Collins = Jim’s dad “American Pie”
Cripes I love Terry